How do I deal with loss in my own life and in the lives of others?


There are many different types of loss that an individual can experience throughout his or her life -- the death of a loved one, the loss of a job, the loss of a certain role or relationship, or even the loss of a dream. These are just some of the losses an individual will potentially face throughout his or her lifetime. While it is true that some losses are more traumatic than others, it is important to remember that all losses are significant, each having a profound impact on the life of the individual, as well as on those associated with the individual who is dealing with the loss.

When tragedy occurs, whatever the tragedy, the questions that a person dealing with loss must grapple with include: "Why would God allow this?" "When will I heal?" "Will God really use this situation for my good?" "How will I rebuild?" Questions of God's sovereignty and providence emerge, along with the problem of evil and human suffering. The individual wonders when his or her life will ever be right again.


First of all, it is important to remember that all rebuilding takes time. It doesn't happen overnight. Often times, our expectations (and often the expectations of others) are that we must move on and get on with our lives quickly. However, it is important to remember that all rebuilding takes time.

Secondly, we must remember to grieve. Often times, our culture says that grieving isn't okay. Or, we're told "just to forgive and forget" or "just to let go." However, with some hurts in our lives, you simply can't forget, and forgiving takes time, as well as letting go. And while the pain in our hearts may not subside for awhile, with the support of others who can come alongside, healing and restoration can begin.

Thirdly, it is important to surrender the hurt, along with the healing, to God. While we may want to rush the process, and out of our own self-effort try to fix ourselves, this will only inhibit our healing. Instead, we must give the healing over to God and realize that He alone is the One who can heal us, restore us and make us new.