From the start, I will tell you that it was difficult for me to write this article. It may prove to be distasteful for you. Still, I respectfully ask you to read on.
The month of May gives me the opportunity to honor you who serve the church as faithful wives, devoted mothers and committed churchwomen. You are a treasure that needs to be guarded, protected and cherished. We value you!
My wife, Beverley, was a pastor’s wife for more than 30 years. During those three decades she, like you, exhibited a myriad of emotions and feelings as she went about her role as a wife, mother and involved laywoman.
In the early years of our ministry we served a church that was unschooled in its treatment of the pastor and his family. A lot of unrealistic expectations were placed on Bev, plus congregants made references to the former pastors and their families , and commented on anything from how she looked to her attendance at church functions. We were pretty young and inexperienced at that time, so we just accepted the situation as part of the pastoral territory. But as we matured in the ministry and assumed responsibility with larger congregations, we soon learned this kind of thing would take its toll on us if we didn’t set some parameters.
We talked it over and, in time, came up with the following guidelines to protect my wife and family. I share them with you for your consideration.
Take my thoughts for what they are worth. They worked well for us. I hope you will think a little bit more about your home and each individual who lives there.
Happy Mother’s Day, dear ladies! You are very special to all of us.
Ever feel like you need to wear a mask to cover up who you are? Are you concerned that, if people knew who you really are and how you really felt, they wouldn't understand?
One minister, two jobs and the family that's at the top of the list. The number of bivocational ministers, those in full- or part-time ministry who carry an additional job, is estimated by some researchers to be as high as 30 percent of ministers nationwide.
"You should see the church they attend," Lucille said, armed with bulletin and newsletter. Creases formed across my brow as celebration gave way to comparisons a trap that had sprung too many times.